Just a Sip?
by Delightfully Dismal
Summary: A Story of Hellsing, and the Girl that steals his heart...well, head at least :P. A Slash-Fic Featuring Alucard and Kozue Yuuki Sugiura's OC Himeno. Enjoy :)


Just a Sip?

Alucard was near his limit. He had been sight seeing at the Louvre with that damn police girl for nearly half the day, and he sorely needed a fix. Since Integra, that damnable wench of a department head, had put him on probation from hard liquor (and since only protestants and queers drink wine on weekdays), his unholiness was forced to squalor inside a nearby cafe. The cafe itself was actually lovely and more than pristine; this made Alucard's insides wretch. The staff, which was made of prissy pants nitwits, did not charm him in the slightest. Every time he would look towards one his glaring eyes would be evaded quickly, as if to convince Alucard that he was not the least bit oddly dressed. It was summer and he was wearing several layers underneath a very large red coat, he damn well knew he stood out like a sore thumb. _Leave it to these French yuppies to get a stick in their ass about being looked upon_, he thought to himself with a twisted smile.

Alucard, after twenty minutes of solitary amusement, realized he was being snubbed. He angrily strode to the store counter, and with the serene smile that had been the last sight of so many helpless fools he asked of the woman behind the cash register, "What does it take for a vampire to get some cream and sugar around here?"

"I'm sorry?" The dark-eyed woman replied, playing coyly with one of her long red strands between her long fingers. Old Ally was not happy with this bitch.

"Get that finger out of your hair and use it to clean the wax out of your ears, woman. I want of pot of coffee!"

"I'm sorry sir," The woman replied as she took out a cowboy hat from behind the counter and placed it on her head. "We're all out."

"Of coffee?!" Alucard replied incredulously.

"Of mercy," The patron said between the grit teeth of her smile as she pulled out a rather large and bloodied butchers knife from behind the counter.

Alucard noticed the wait-staff beginning to surround him, and was not surprised them all to be werewolves armed to the teeth.

"Oh, you slay me!" Alucard began to jest. "Was this all for me, really? You shouldn't have!"

The grinning vampire took hold of his pistol in his off hand just as a waiter dug his teeth into his poised arm. Alucard buried the point of the barrel deep in the mutts chest and let loose several rounds that both stopped his heart and relieved him of several gallons of his filthy blood. The next mutt took a bullet straight between the eyes, and while not pressed for time Alucard found it much more sporting to kick his partner straight between the legs and right out the store window. As the glass shattered across a few patrons, the remaining lackeys took off post haste.

"I'm sure that happens all the time." Alucard replied. "They were shit waiters anyways, twenty minutes and I didn't get a single drop of coffee. I take it your Himeno, you certainly look like a dog."

"Would it have killed you to wait?" Himeno spoke, her mouth positively drooling at the thought of wiping the damn smirk off his face.

"No, and neither will you." Alucard chuckled. In the time it took him to blink, Himeno crashed through the counter and sliced off the snotty vampires head. With the flick of her wrist the head landed in her ten-gallon hat.

"Not so cocky now, are you?" Himeno smiled

"This is hardly the kind of impression you want to make on foreigners!" Alucard berated back at her idly. "How about we call it a draw?"

Himeno tossed his head across the room. It bounced off the wall, and then once more off of Himeno's head as she began to play a rousing game of futbol with herself.

"This. Is. Very. Depressing." Alucard spoke in grunts.

"Yeah, most of the men I meet in France last much longer than a few minutes."

"You did not." Alucard said angrily.

Himeno picked up Alucard by his long scraggly hair and looked him dead in the eye. "It's OK hon, they make a pill for that."

Alucard quickly reformed himself and was soon grasping Himeno by the hands. "Care to dance love? Or do you want me to put you down like a good mutt!"

Himeno struggled in vain to get out of his grasp. "Put. Me. Down!"

"Of course love." Alucard smiled as he slammed her into the ground. Himeno's body gave a slight rattle, and she was sure she could taste blood in her mouth.

"Man," Alucard said as he began to walk away from the broken down cafe, "Never wanted a Big Mac this much in my life."

"You **cough** can't walk away from-"

"Yes I can!"

Himeno coughed a few drops of blood up and then rolled over on her side, her face was painted with a wry smile. "Damn Brits, bet he doesn't call back either..."


End file.
